Apparently it’s funny to slip in polyamorous sexual parties between mechanical objects as a fantasy for a main Star Wars hero in a kid’s book. Yes, you read that right. We can’t believe it’s real either.
If you can believe it, we keep this article as clean as we possibly can while dealing with an explicit topic brought about by an author for teen Star Wars content.
It’s another day, another article about Star Wars that goes so far that it strains your ability to believe it’s reality. And yet it is. Again.
This time we’re bringing you a couple of tweets involving Daniel José Older, a self-proclaimed architect of the Star Wars High Republic novels aimed at tweens, teens and young adults. Here’s the bio for Mr. Older from his website:
Daniel José Older, a lead story architect for Star Wars: The High Republic, is the New York Times best-selling author of the upcoming Young Adult fantasy novel Ballad & Dagger (book 1 of the Outlaw Saints series), the sci-fi adventure Flood City, the monthly comic series The High Republic Adventures. His other books include the historical fantasy series Dactyl Hill Squad, The Book of Lost Saints, the Bone Street Rumba urban fantasy series, Star Wars: Last Shot, and the Young Adult series the Shadowshaper Cypher, including Shadowshaper, which was named one of the best fantasy books of all time by TIME magazine and one of Esquire’s 80 Books Every Person Should Read. He won the International Latino Book Award and has been nominated for the Kirkus Prize, The World Fantasy Award, the Andre Norton Award, the Locus, and the Mythopoeic Award. He co-wrote the upcoming graphic novel Death’s Day. You can find more info and read about his decade long career as an NYC paramedic at http://danieljoseolder.net/
And here is an excerpt from one of Mr. Older’s Star Wars novels:
“Oh, you know another thing that could happen?” Rambled Lando, chuckling to himself. “Like a droid orgy of some kind, but with astromechs and those old Battle Droids from the Clone Wars? And then they could make Astrobattle droid babies? That… that would be something.”
So we’ve known about the twisted and psychologically deranged material that is in these kids’ books about Star Wars (I bet their parents don’t though). Don’t forget the time a literal rock with some form of sentience had a sex talk with a kid in one of the High Republic novels:
Someone explain to me why this is in a book aimed at middle school/ high school aged kids? @claudiagray ? @starwars ? @Lucasfilm_Ltd ? pic.twitter.com/KgRXHhKtxP
— NoCoMoGirl (@nocomohawk1995) March 15, 2021
But what makes this different is that today the author, Mr. Older, actually laughed on Twitter that the robot orgy discussion by Star Wars hero, Lando, made it past Lucasfilm and Disney censors. This is the kind of numbskulls who are writing children’s content. I’d use a term that has been banned from Twitter and Reddit… I bet you can guess what it is.
Pull the plug, Bob. It’s time to clean house at Lucasfilm and throughout all this cesspool that is Star Wars. I’m no prude, but this stuff being written for kids is beyond weird. It’s gross. Parents don’t want to buy their kids a Star Wars novel for tweens and find out later that rocks are having sex talks and Lando is fantasizing about robot orgies. Take the “Fifty Shades of the Force” stuff for children and fire everybody associated with it.
Anyway, that’s my take. But hey, maybe I just don’t see the morality that would allow for an adult to write this kind of crap for kiddos. I bet most normal people don’t.
For all the latest news that should be fun, keep reading That Park Place. As always, drop a comment down below and let us know you’re thoughts. Keep it clean and polite, please.
